I had planned to publish this group on Friday – I wanted to wait until then for some of my favorite fashion link ups. And as I went to go hit “Publish”, my dogwalker told me about the shooting. Every blogger and their mom has talked about this, so you don’t need me to tell you how sad and heartbroken I am, because I know that you are too. But when I walked into the door that night and saw Tyler the first time all day, I fell into his arms and sobbed.
When I signed up to be a mother, I knew I’d have to fight her to eat green veggies. And I’d have to make sure she took baths regularly. I knew I needed to take her to doctor appointments, keep her carseat rear facing as long as possible, and hold her hand when we walked in the road. I expected having sleepless nights when she was sick or teething, and I anticipated the anguish of holding her in my lap when she got shots – always worse for me than her. I never, in a million years, thought I’d have to worry about her safety at school. It never crossed my mind that, my job as a mother to worry about her, won’t be paused from 8am-3pm while she attends Kindergarten. It hit me, for the first time, that I can’t plan everything. Protecting my daughter is a job that is not in my hands – its in God’s. And I cried all day Friday. And I cried most of Saturday. And I’m crying right now. Because I trust that God knows what is best for my baby girl, and whatever happens to her is His will. But now, it is one more uncertainty in life. I’m a control freak. I’m seriously OCD, I have a history of eating issues, and I’ve been known to have breakdowns when I can’t find my keys. This shooting shattered my life, and everything I thought I’d built up to protect my daughter. Because sometimes, you can’t. I don’t think I’ll ever be the same. Those poor babies, and those poor mamas.
Ugh, so needless to say, I’m a wreck, and it seemed highly inappropriate to blog about my clothes. But I’ve been devouring radio shows and interviews, and I think I need to balance normal life, and my grief for families I’ve never even met. So I’ll blog here, and I’ll just cry a little bit more at home, as I hold my daughter and fiercely pray thanks that she is still in my life.
Two presentations in two of my classes called for dressing up. And, this was the first (only?) way I came up with to dress down my black silk peplum dress for the wedding. I love the sheer blouse underneath, and will absolutely be wearing this combination again!
I can’t get enough of these sequin pants. I walk downstairs, and Tyler just shakes his head, but they are FABULOUS! They feel like sweatpants, they shimmer like glitter and unicorn magic, and they are pretty flattering as well. Dressed them down with flats and a white silk camp-style shirt for a casual Saturday.
On Day 8 I didn’t actually get dressed – I stayed in PJs all day. But Day 7 I wore two outfits (casual sequin pants and dressy night out), so I’m just rolling the PM outfit over to the next day
Surprise 40th birthday party for one of my dearest friends. I wasn’t sure what to wear, so erred on the side of casual (for me) with jeans and a moto-style jacket, keeping it fun with a gold clutch and heels. You know who had more fun that night? Birthday girl’s husband. I sure was glad I wasn’t him the next morning! But a fantastic night with fantastic friends…we are so blessed.
Also, a confession: this outfit was truly worn to this party, but I had my hair in a bun (I think there is a shot on Instagram?). I have no idea where those pictures are, so I recreated the outfit today for a new picture shoot. You’re welcome.
The morning after an all nighter studying for two finals. ‘Nuff said.
Yeah. More finals. My brain is a disaster at this point. And if you’re thinking “my, her hair looks the same is yesterday”, yeah, it hasn’t been washed in three days. Thus the hat.
Biggest challenge this week: Bumming it when I am exhausted from studying and work. On the bright side, a small wardrobe selection meant less deliberation in the mornings…
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PPS, linking up with Glamamom for Mingle Monday and…